boundaries
September 2008 
What In The World?!
Posted on Jul 14th, 2008
by 
MsCapriKell
MsCapriKell
I guess the Universe is really opening to challenging me in ways that just leave me drop-jaw ... I've updated my phone number to a Colorado number and sent it out to all of my contacts - including one in particular who recently reconnected with me after a VERY bizarre turn of events where she had lashed out at me -- but, I am the type of person who is open enough to allow reconnections to "heal" or work through things ... so I had started communicating with her again. Received pictures of her family, emails about a condo she was purchasing... so I was really OPEN to allowing this to grow back into a friendship connection despite the past experiences.
So... today, after having sent out the email; I get a response back from her basically saying;
"I thought it may have been obvious that I lost interest in reconnecting with you since I haven't instigated any more contact with you since May...You emailed me once after that and I emailed you back with a very short response...Then you sent me an invite to one of your new websites a while ago and I didn't respond and now this email...
Just so there is no confusion and so you won't be energetically tied to me, I'm letting you know that I'm not interested in any reconnection...I've already severed any remaining ties and I would advise you do the same..."
Seriously CONFUSED ...
What is it with passive-aggressive people in my life .... am I passive-aggressive and just not seeing ways in which I am being that way? Is that why those types of people are being brought to the fore-front of my life right now?
Well, that's it .... no more... I am stating my boundaries from now forward with friendship. There are things I will NOT tolerate in my life ... PERIOD. This kind of bs is not okay with me at ALL!
And yes.... this gets me ANGRY ... I don't know any human alive who wouldn't get their feathers ruffled about this kind of "hook and reel" method of screwing with someone's mind and then just dropping someone once they've reconnected .... it's not cool.... not cool at all.
okay... it's off my heart/chest .... so this irritation will pass quickly out of my life.
</rant>
So... today, after having sent out the email; I get a response back from her basically saying;
"I thought it may have been obvious that I lost interest in reconnecting with you since I haven't instigated any more contact with you since May...You emailed me once after that and I emailed you back with a very short response...Then you sent me an invite to one of your new websites a while ago and I didn't respond and now this email...
Just so there is no confusion and so you won't be energetically tied to me, I'm letting you know that I'm not interested in any reconnection...I've already severed any remaining ties and I would advise you do the same..."
Seriously CONFUSED ...
What is it with passive-aggressive people in my life .... am I passive-aggressive and just not seeing ways in which I am being that way? Is that why those types of people are being brought to the fore-front of my life right now?
Well, that's it .... no more... I am stating my boundaries from now forward with friendship. There are things I will NOT tolerate in my life ... PERIOD. This kind of bs is not okay with me at ALL!
And yes.... this gets me ANGRY ... I don't know any human alive who wouldn't get their feathers ruffled about this kind of "hook and reel" method of screwing with someone's mind and then just dropping someone once they've reconnected .... it's not cool.... not cool at all.
okay... it's off my heart/chest .... so this irritation will pass quickly out of my life.
</rant>
Access: Public
you may need to open up a little more….or shut down
Wow! That email stopped me in my tracks too and I don't even have one tie to the situation! Who would go sending pictures and THEN send the brush off letter?! Bizarre and twisted the first time and bizarre and twisted the second time, too. Have you thought that maybe you're the exact opposite of bizarre and twisted and that's why you attract this type of person?
Just wondering out loud because I'm an extreme extrovert with an entire colony of introverts for friends! Oh yes, and family. And even more so, my David! Where'd all the introverts in my life come from?!
I'm trying to send you down a different path then, “what's wrong with me that these challenges keep popping up” train of thought!
Smiles!
amber
Kelly, take a look at and see if this might help. Cords, hooks, attachments - how to handle them
Be grateful you don't have to deal with her.
Let her go, you are much better off without her game playing.
It's her loss, Kelly. You are a wonderful person and friend.
Big Hugs XOOX
Wow. I didn't know May really was that long ago! I wonder how she could have severed all remaining ties before she sent this? We shall overcome…..
That email was hurtful to say the least. I'm really sorry she felt compelled to hit send, much less compose it in the first place. Kelly, you are a really sweet person. That is obvious to anyone who meets you.
Maze … tis true, tis true.
Amber, thank you for that perspective reminder! I honestly didn't think of it like that… I see all connections as teacher so I automatically think “learn” when I encounter these.
THANK YOU, Meenakshi … that is most helpful to read!!!
Ladybear … your gentleness with me is amazing - deepest bows always!
“We shall overcome” … yes, Don John, I do believe that … getting this post off my chest is one way I am learning to “let go” and allow the Universe to flow.
And, OMG, emdot - you joined here! - thank you so much for this! I just had an epiphany when reading your comment ….
“reflections … we only see what we are looking for in the mirrors of our existence - others are who we make them to be”
I have such a sense of peace now … it makes sense; it is not about me - I knew this would pass quickly … but even I am surprised at just how quickly this has hit me.
I think this is one of those situations when knowing how to curse up a storm is a rather useful skill.
I'm ROFL Umguy! That is a good reason to keep my blue cloud o' filthy mouth skill in my lil' toolbox of life! Always kept to myself, of course, at the bottom of the box so's nobody gets friendly fire so to speak! It made me grin to think of Ms. CapriKell swearing at her monitor!
Smiles!
Amber
**giggles**
yeah, WTF has become a quick way to reference bottled up swearing … although, I've never ripped into a swear streak AT someone … no one has *seen* me angry, nor felt the wrath of what it's like to cross “that boundary” with me. No one has opened those flood gates. o.0
Swearing is also awesome because there's just something inherently funny about it. At my most frustrated I'll actually sit down and just write (type) out all the angry thoughts with as many dirty words as possible. Then I password protect that doc and store it away. Really helps.
MsCK: Now you've thrown down the gauntlet and folks will want to see you swear. Because it would probably be awesome.
And funny! This blog would get put on the Hottest Blog of the Year for the heat comin' off it! LOL Let 'er rip Ms! WTF is a great start! Try using some of these…. XD
Amber: OMG! WTF! YGTBKM. It would be like learning another language.
its all about energy… we have so much n we can choose where to put it or with whom to share it…
n ive learned a lot about it these past 2yrs… (about earthly time)… theres only 24 hrs in 1 day (even when we expend its still limiting) n b4 i wanted to connect with every single person on this entire planet (its written on myspace page under: who do u wonna meet: All 6.5+ billion ppl) … now i wonna still meet all 6.5+ but only if they wonna get to know me 2… ^.^
PS. also ~S posted on his page he said … but do not waist my time, …. the more you take of my time the less I have to give to others.
PPS. i read this on carolyn myss site ahile ago one of those daily quotes n i love it:
she said: if someone complicates ur life walk away!!!
anyway…. wanted to say hi… love uuuuuuuuuuuuu ^.^
this gets me ANGRY … I don't know any human alive who wouldn't get their feathers ruffled about this kind of “hook and reel” method of screwing with someone's mind
Some people seem to thrive on the affect (negative if they cannot affect positive) on others. Yet, their power is in your hands. If you do not allow your feathers to be ruffled, your mind to remain pure (since it is yours, after all), and to continue with compassion always, then this methodology ceases to have relevance.
Your wonderful spirit deserves better, to be sure. As long as you know this, then it should not matter. No?
How funny, huh K? Amazing ego and issues we have as people.
What about love, love, love revolution?! Will that upgrade the hearts of humanity.
Much love to ya